Guest Blog: I Have Epilepsy

For the first time ever, I'm turning my blog over to someone else to share their story. In this instance, it is my amazing sister Nicki, who as you will read, has been through a lot recently and is doing incredibly well in her recovery. Here's Nicki's story:

After recently seeing a number of friends and family, particularly Daniel, open up about their own health to improve mental awareness, I was inspired to write this.

There is a lack of awareness about numerous different medical conditions and the number of individuals affected. One reason for this is that many people are not open about their conditions. I was definitely one of those people. I only told my closest friends and family that I have epilepsy. I have had a few seizures in front of friends but they didn’t know as I just blacked out for a few seconds. Only myself and my husband knew it was a seizure (many people aren’t aware of what seizures can look like). I hardly ever spoke about my medical condition. I didn’t even like talking about it with my husband or parents.

I have had epilepsy since I was 10 years old. It has been part of me for two thirds of my life (as I’m now 30). The last few years have not been fantastic as my epilepsy has not been under control and I was continually trying new med after new med and increasing doses and so forth. My doctor introduced the idea of epilepsy surgery a number of years ago now, which I was not keen about at all. I actually left his office crying the first time he brought the idea up. He talked about it over the years and I researched it weighing up the pros and cons. I then realised that I couldn’t go on the way I was, constantly having my meds work for a short period of time and then I’d start having seizures again.

I had neurosurgery (left temporal lobectomy to be specific) 6 weeks ago and am now recovering. I actually think I’m doing really well after such a short recovery period. So far so good. I am yet to have a seizure so let’s hope that lasts forever. I do not feel like I have suffered from any side effects, so anyone out there considering the surgery I highly recommend talking to your neurologist about it (I know it’s early on for me). I have been lucky enough to have a wonderful husband, family and close friends to support me throughout this recovery period, which I’m sure has made a difference. The last few months have been a major time in my, my husband’s and my family’s lives and support is really important for everyone. I originally did not want to tell the world about my surgery, but more and more people knew in recent months and all I and my family have been receiving is love and support. I was quite astonished with the messages and gifts people sent me over my initial recovery period. It’s made me realise that being open about your own medical condition is actually highly beneficial as it increases awareness as well as your support network. I still have my closest friends around me who have watched me recover over these last few weeks but also know that many people (around the world) care about me and will always be there for me.

I have a number of close friends and family members with medical conditions, including psychological, neurological as well as others. Some are now open about their conditions whereas others only talk to their closest friends and family members. I completely understand why people wouldn’t discuss their medical condition with others, as I didn’t for 20 years. However, it is important to improve the awareness of these conditions, including just how common many are in society. I hope after reading this (and other recent blogs, such as Daniel’s) others also feel encouraged to open up about their medical conditions.

If anyone with epilepsy or any other medical condition want to contact me, to ask me any questions, to chat or for support, please feel free to on nickicousens@yahoo.com.au

That’ll Do Rabbit, That’ll Do

Adam Reynolds opening the scoring against the Raiders

And so just like that the Rabbitohs season is over. Surprisingly almost all the Rabbitohs fans I’ve spoken to or seen post online seem to have a very similar mindset after the team was eliminated in the preliminary final.  Whilst the result was obviously disappointing, the loss was fair and yet so cruel due to the untimely injury to Adam Reynolds who is arguably the team’s most important player. That, in and of itself, is a huge statement to make about a rookie but there you go.

All fans seem to be very content with the result of the season as a whole, finishing third on the ladder, qualifying for the preliminary final and the emergence of several new players such as Reynolds, Everingham and Justin Hunt, as well as the development of others like Farrell, Peats, McQueen etc.

What I love most however, is that whilst the fans are quite content with how the season played out, the players themselves aren’t in the same boat. Nathan Merritt was quoted as saying he sees the season as a failure and that is exactly how I want him to feel. I don’t want him to feel like a failure, he most certainly isn’t, however if the team is happy with just being competitive, then the concern would be that 2012 is as good as it will get.

We see 2012 as a success because we naturally assume that a young team, with a first year coach will improve going forward. It makes sense that if the Rabbitohs can perform this well with youngsters and rookies in many positions as well as the first year of a new system, each year after will be even better. However, you really never know with this stuff. Look at the Tigers and Warriors change in fortunes from 2011 to 2012, or the Eels from 2009 when they made the Grand Final until now.

A friend of mine who supports the Eels warned me that I shouldn’t be satisfied with just getting this far because you never know when you’ll get this close again. When the opportunity is there, you have to take it. Not every team can be Melbourne or Manly and contend for years on end. The hope is that the Rabbitohs will be more like the Storm, where Maguire learned from Bellamy, and be able to turn a promising season into a successful era; however it is certainly not guaranteed.

As important as 2012 was for the Rabbitohs, 2013 is even more important. They will enter the season not just with expectations to be serious contenders, but anything short of the 2012 performance will be considered a failure, not just by the team but by the fans as well. Was 2012 the start of something, or one good year?

After years of being quite unlucky with injuries, 2012 was about as lucky as a club can get in that department for the Cardinal and Myrtle. Roy Asotasi was the only long term injury and he returned in time and in form to make a solid contribution to the finals series. Nathan Merritt missed the first part of the season but hit the ground running as soon as he returned. Even the Greg Inglis suspension could be considered a stroke of luck as it enabled GI to refresh his body for the backend of the season, whilst the team went 2-1 without him.

We can’t assume 2013 will be quite as lucky in that regard. The club has the depth now to cover for most positions, especially in the forwards, but it doesn’t surprise me to see rumours of interest in Blake Ayshford and Sandor Earl to add depth to the backline stocks. I’m also a fan of Jordan Tongahai who plays left centre for the Toyota Cup side.

Another question is whether Souths will be impacted more during Origin in 2013. Obviously Inglis will be missing. Te’o is another who might be selected for Queensland and then you have the possibility that Adam Reynolds might be called up for NSW or even finally Nathan Merritt might get his chance. If that happens, will the Rabbitohs have the form slump that the Storm and Broncos experienced after Origin was over and if so, will they be able to bounce back the way the Storm did and Broncos didn’t?

Optimistically I see the Rabbitohs getting at least as far as they did this year, but I certainly won’t be taking it for granted. For now I’ll spend the offseason content and very proud of the performance of a team that hadn’t won a finals game since I was a baby. Being there to see the team beat the Raiders and win a finals match is an experience I’ll never forget and for that I thank Michael Maguire and the entire team.

Now for South Sydney to march on. Glory Glory.

Are You Ok? (Part 2)

In honour of it being both R U OK? Day today and World Suicide Prevention Day earlier this week I thought it was appropriate for me to write a follow up to the piece about mental health I wrote a few weeks back. That article ended up being read by many more people than I ever could have hoped for and I still am getting people talking to me about it.

I wrote that article on the spur of the moment and really just hoped it got through to one person and maybe did a little bit a of good, but it’s been probably the most heart warming and overwhelming experience of my life since writing that one little article. I’d just like to thank everyone who shared it and passed it on to others in the hopes of getting that message out there.

I was also really glad to see that mental health has been getting a lot of publicity lately. Not just with famous cases like what has been happening with Charlotte Dawson, but also a story on the 7:30 Report on ABC as well as this week’s 4 Corners episode. Shows like that can really do a lot to get things into the public eye and I hope more people are thinking about mental health as a large issue in society because of it.

With it being R U OK? Day today, I really do hope you take the time out of your day to ask people if they are OK. I personally had a session with my psychologist this morning and she was telling me that asking people is important, but also, as much as it can be awkward, if you are legitimately worried about that person you have to be specific and ask if they have had any suicidal thoughts. It’s a very difficult question to ask and people often worry that they are going to put those thoughts into the head of the person they are asking, but all research shows that you need to ask those questions specifically and that you certainly won’t be putting thoughts in their head. Hopefully they will answer by telling you it’s silly and they have never thought about it, but sometimes you might be surprised by what the answer is.

Also of equal importance, whilst asking someone today is a great start, let’s not make this a once a year thing. Today is supposed to be a catalyst to ask people regularly and give people the avenue to talk. In fact, asking someone if they ok often won’t be answered that day. They will often tell you they are fine, but eventually when they are ready to talk, they will come to you because you are the person who asked previously.

Today is a great initiative and I hope you all get behind it. So to all those who are reading, I ask you....

Are you OK?

That Unfamiliar Feeling

This guy goes alright

As I write this I am sitting on Jetstar flight 513 to Melbourne as I prepare to watch my beloved Rabbitohs compete in the finals. I’m also visiting my sister and her new puppy, but you don’t care about that. This experience is certainly unfamiliar to me and most Rabbitohs fans under the age of 35 or so. Sure everyone knows that the Rabbitohs haven’t won the Grand Final since 1971 and that we have only even competed in one finals match since 1989, but some people don’t realise that the Rabbitohs haven’t won a finals match in my 27 years on this earth.

Now obviously there is no guarantee at all that we will see a victory in 2012, but with a guaranteed double chance, the second of which is a home game, I would like to believe there is a pretty decent chance you will see the Rabbitohs in the preliminary final in two weeks time. A friend of mine (a Roosters fan no less) already texted me suggesting we are already only one win away from a grand final, as he sees it as being nigh on impossible for us to lose both of our next two games. I wish I had his confidence.

Sure I do think we are a good chance to qualify, but there is also a chance we repeat the efforts of 1989 with back to back losses leading to elimination and fans wondering what happened. Hopefully no current Rabbitoh ends up being remembered as the 2012 Steve Mavin.

As I wrote previously, I still am conditioned to be pessimistic about the Rabbitohs, even as we are firmly entrenched into this new era of professionalism under Michael Maguire. Then again, if I thought we were certainly going to lose on Saturday, I wouldn’t be on a plane to Melbourne right now (that may be a lie; after all I’m still visiting my sister).

Anyway, the feeling it seems that I and other Rabbitohs fans have right now is one of excitement, but also restlessness. There is the old saying “Act like you’ve been there before”, but the problem is we haven’t been there before and thus we are acting accordingly. The whole concept of having to wait and find out when our game is so we can book finals tickets and flights etc was completely foreign to myself and my other Rabbitohs fan friends. Within a few minutes of the game being announced, I had three texts from friends about flights and tickets and when we were heading down etc. We’re like kids in a candy store, only if the kids had been driving past the candy store every day without going inside, only now are we allowed to go in and buy a lolly. We just hope that lolly tastes like victory and that the players are better than we are at acting like they’ve been there before.

Glory Glory fellow Rabbitohs. Enjoy your lolly.